1 The big choices

2 The farewell

More about the farewell: place, who leads it, readings, what to wear

3 People and papers

Say where papers are, never the numbers on them.

Where your papers are: will, insurance, prepaid plan, cemetery, military

4 Money and a few words

Your wishes, ready to share

This updates as you type. Nothing is sent anywhere.

Thinking about a prepaid funeral plan?

Some people pay for their funeral ahead of time. It can spare your family money worries. In Tennessee these contracts have clear rules. Before you sign, it helps to know them.

  • Check the seller. The funeral home or seller must be licensed or registered with the state. You can look them up on verify.tn.gov.
  • Ask how it’s paid for. The contract must say if your money goes into a trust or into a life insurance policy. For a trust, the seller must put all the money in within 15 days.
  • Guaranteed or not? The contract must say if the prices are guaranteed. If they are not, ask who pays the difference later.
  • Can you get your money back? The contract must say if it is revocable or irrevocable. With a revocable trust, you can ask in writing for your payments back, plus interest, minus allowed fees. An irrevocable one is not refundable. But the money can still move to another licensed funeral home.
  • Keep it findable. Keep your copy somewhere your family can reach, not only in a safe deposit box. Tell someone you trust where it is. You can add it above.

Sources: Tennessee Department of Commerce and Insurance, Tenn. Code § 62-5-406, § 62-5-407. This is general information, not legal advice.

Talking about it with your family

Many people find this talk easier than they feared. You don’t need to cover everything at once. A few ways to begin:

  • “I filled out a page about what I’d want someday. Can I show you?”
  • “After Grandpa’s funeral, I started thinking about what I’d want. Have you ever thought about it?”
  • “I don’t want you to have to guess one day. Could we talk for ten minutes?”

If you use an AI assistant, these questions work well:

Starting the talk with a parent

I want to ask my [mother] about her wishes for her funeral, but I’m afraid of upsetting her. Suggest a few gentle ways to start the conversation, and questions I could ask over time.

Before buying a prepaid funeral plan

I’m thinking about buying a prepaid funeral plan in Tennessee. Here is what the funeral home offered: [paste it]. Help me understand it and list the questions I should ask before signing. Don’t guess at what the contract says.